Crazy lil thing called love...

Last week, I was contemplating this thing called love as I debated love marriage vs. arranged marriage. I have friends who fell in love and are happily married despite the wears and tears that life causes and the added responsibility of children. I also have friends who went to India and married each other after a 30 minute conversation, they too have sustained happy marriages. I stopped for a moment to think about why I prefer falling in love before marriage opposed to falling in love after marriage...and while I was thinking about all this...I threw in the question..."what is love?"

Here's what I came up with: Please do remember that this is MY personal opinion, which pretty much counts for nothing in the larger scheme of things. I have this fear that if I marry someone somewhat compatible in hopes of loving him eventually...I might never find that love, and I'll be stuck in a loveless marriage. (because to me...marriage is for keeps) So that brings me to my next question?

What is love? I don't want to have some cheesy, romantic notion about love...because if that's my expectation, I might never find it. So, I thought about it...for days...and then yesterday, I saw the perfect example of love. I used to know this guy and back in his younger days he was the typical bachelor. But he wasn't a dumb guy who chose to be a player...he was just an overly smart guy who thought this love stuff was just hogwash...and marriage was just a piece of paper that bonded two people unneccesarily because it takes more than marriage to bond people. That is, until he found love. He's now married and expecting a baby...I talked to him for a good 20 minutes, and he never stopped smiling the entire time. THAT is how happy he is.

All that being said, I don't think I will ever truly be able to define love. But, as of right now, this is it what love entails (for me)....The person I love will be someone who opens my eyes to a new way of thought...brings out a different...better side of me. Someone who makes me think that the impossible, just might be possible. He'll listen to me talk about my dreams/goals/aspirations...and his eyes will light up with the same excitement as mine do...When I whine whimper, he'll do more than just be a shoulder to lean and say "there, there"...he'll grab me by the shoulders...if need be...and say buck up, be strong...and he'll encourage me. He'll remind me that God has a promise for our lives...and we must live every day accordingly. He's someone who would find a bead in his shoe and say, "you dropped a bead," and not..."these dumb beads are everywhere."... He'd even read the chick-lit short story I wrote...regardless of the fact he's strictly reads science fiction...He'll respect my interests...He's someone I can not only go to church with on Sundays...but who would do outreaches with me and have an interest to get involved with the things of God and be involved with the people of God. He's someone who would give my mom a hug when he sees her...not because he has to, but because he really wants to....and he'll be good to my friends because they're his friends too. Of course, he won't be perfect all the time...He'll have bad days when he's "mood out"...but on those days he'll let me encourage him and tell him to snap out of it if need be. He'd also ask me opinions on things...not just what tie to wear with his shirt, but what to stock to invest in and what to do when he's facing a problem or sticky situation. He's someone I can chuckle with...travel to new places with...someone I'd be happy to come home to....someone who brings a smile to my face...not just when he walks in the door...but every time I talk about him with my someone. He's someone I'd be proud of...even when he messes up...because I know he'll do the right thing.

Is that too much to ask? I don't think so...he's out there...somewhere!