The topic of today’s discussion is “loyalty.” It’s something that’s been on my brain this weekend, and I’m kind of curious how the rest of the blogosphere feels about the subject. The question is how much loyalty can you expect from your friends and love ones before you cross the line?
I have one friend who has spoiled me by her fierce loyalty. It’s the one trait in her that sets her apart from everyone else…and the one that I appreciate beyond measure. When someone has hurt me or offended me, she too takes it personally. In her mind, it doesn’t matter that the person never did anything to her…she takes offense to her friend’s offense.
There have been several million times, when I have witnessed closed friends cozy up to, exchange niceties, and befriend someone who has hurt me…and it merely re-opens the wound and pours acid in it . I try my best not to let it bother me, but for some reason, it gets the best of me every single time.
Sometimes I have to stop and ask myself if I would be the same way? Would I be overtly mean to someone who never wronged me, but wronged someone I care about? I think back to certain cases…I have definitely followed through on my instinct to be loyal…but sometimes I haven’t…I couldn’t bring myself to give the cold shoulder to someone who I didn’t feel really did anything “wrong” in the tiff with my friend. Which brings me back to the question…. how much loyalty can you expect from your friends and love ones before you cross the line?
Monday, February 09, 2009
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3 comments:
you know, i'm a person that's learned as i've gotten older, that you cannot let your grievances towards a person affect how everyone else treats them or judges them. ultimately, as adults we have to assess and give everyone an individual chance despite stigmas or reputations we've heard about them. you have to judge someoen yourself before you decide to like them or not.
that being said, i think if someone has a reputation or stigma as being dishonest or something, you should defly be careful in your dealings with them.
See i'm torn. And the two halves don't quite make a whole.
Realistically, I'm with sibil. I mean, experience has taught me that you have to base your judgment of people on first hand interactions. I mean, so much of life happens in the subtext. And that's the type of stuff that drives the tonality and chemistry of a relationship. So it is harsh to judge someone based on one person's take on the individual.
On the other hand, if an entire village feels the same way, there must be some truth to it. So watch out.
Having said that, i also know that inherently i'm an extremely loyal person. And if someone ouched my BFF or family, I would probably be wary of them without ever having met them.
In fact, who am I kidding - in the past, I have written people off because they crossed the line with BFF or the fam - when the perp and I had a perfectly fine relationship in the past.But in the end, the person i love the most wins. Immature? absolutely. But that's me.
So maybe its a case of do as i say, not do as i do :)
cmon suee...u gotta update!!!!
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