Pee-yewh!

Baby steps...that's what I'm taking...maybe one day, I'll be blogging as regularly as I used to. But, right now, I make no promises.

I went to Walmart last night...I was in desperate need of green tea and some healthy snacks. I've lost ten pounds since I've been back and am hoping to lose just a mere 30 more. (ay yi yi!) Anyhoo, back to my story...While I was at Walmart, I smelled something quite strange and quite gross. The stench took me back....way back to 4th grade. There was a kid in my class named Shane...he had bowl-cut blonde hair and thick rimmed glasses. He usually kep to himself because no one really wanted to socialize with the poor kid. There were two reasons why. 1. He ate his boogars. Yep, I witnessed it a few times. He didn't just pick and pop it in his mouth either. He picked, inspected his fingertip carefully and then popped it in his mouth. 2. He peed in his pants. Would you like to take a wild guess at who the teacher decided to seat next to Shane? I'll help you out. A very adorable, brown-eyed, new girl with pigtails and elastic pants named Susan Varghese!! The stench of Shane's dried pee pants burned in my nostrils day in and day out. But, I uttered not one complaint because I was way too shy to utter complaints back then. It was that same nasty smell that I smelled at Walmart last night. I quickly turned and looked to my right...by force of old habit....but there was no Shane next to me. I proceeded to sniff everything...sniffed in my cart...sniffed in my purse...sniffed my shirt...sniffed my mom...but I couldn't place the stank. It seemed to just be floating through the air...drifting around my nose. I walked a bit further....and smelled it again...I re-sniffed everything I had sniffed the first time...which irritated my mom just a tad and made her a bit insecure at the same time. Finally, we were standing in the check out line. I had just bought my green tea and healthy snacks and was waiting on my mom some-what-patiently as she figured out the automatic credit card swiper thing....and then it pimp-slapped me...the stench. It just stepped up and smacked me straight in the face. I looked at the cashier and my mom and could tell that they had been smacked with it as well. The source was standing in line behind my mother. He was holding a new pair of jeans, which he desperately needed...since his the current pair he was wearing was ripped down the inside of his pant leg...exposing not only his thighs but his family jewels! (not that I was even remotely looking!...but some things you can just figure out) The poor guy had a long, dirty, off-white beard and was carrying on quite the conversation with himself. I'm not sure if he just happened to be everywhere I was in at Walmart...or if the stench just stayed and lingered around even after he had passed. Regardless...I was ready to get the hellz outta there and smell some fresh, clean air!