Cocunuts!

pelf \PELF\, noun:
Money; riches; gain; -- generally conveying the idea of something ill-gotten.

Sentence: Everyone knew that the pelf she suddenly attained was from the work she did afterhours as she walked scantily dressed on Lincoln Boulevard.

The other day I called someone a coconut. She didn't know whether she was insulted or complimented. I tried to explain that it was neither an insult nor a compliment...just a statement that she obviously didn't understand. For those of you who don't know what a coconut is...it's a person who is Indian on the outside, but 100% American in the inside. The person in question tried to convince me she was Indian by blurting out some malayalam words, which she totally butchered. Finally, I asked her why she felt I was insulting her...why she felt that she had to defend herself to prove my statement wrong. I told her there was nothing wrong with being a coconut...it's just the way she is and that's just how it goes. Then she wanted me to explain WHY I think she's a coconut. I began to explain that she doesn't know a thing about Indian culture, traditions, can't intelligably speak the language, and...last but not least...she hates Indians. If that isn't a coconut, I'm not sure what is.

I think she might have had a tinge of guilt at that point until I pointed out my theory of how she became a coconut. My theory is that most coconuts...not all, but most...become this way because of their parents. I think I shared this theory in my book (I'm not sure because it's been a long time since I read it)...Parents came to America, and were so hell bent on keeping "tradition"...that they didn't teach us culture. They taught us tradition as culture. Most of us either grew up accepting these traditions or turning completely against them. But in our minds, it wasn't tradition we were turning away from it was "culture." Sadly, our culture has been lost to us. We were never taught the beauty of Indian art, literature, music, etc. The food is perhaps the only taste of culture we have received.

I'm happy to say that this coconut is trying to rectify the situation. She told me she bought this book about a form of massage that was originated in Kerala. Mothers have apparently been teaching their children this massage technique for generations. Oddly enough, it's something I never heard of. But when it comes right down to it, there's a ton of things about India and the Indian culture that I've never heard of. In a way, my conversation with her was a challenge to myself...to take time to really know my culture...not just traditions.