Thinking out loud...

When you are sick people like to tell you to have faith that you will be healed...to speak it into existence...to REALLY believe. I've been told these things a lot lately and I'm not sure how I feel about it.

Do I believe God can heal? Absolutely!! My BF is a walking miracle!  She was diagnosed with cardio myopathy when she was 17. Doctors said that she would need a heart transplant to survive. Her heart stopped twice. Not only did her heart start beating again...but she's alive and healthy today without a heart transplant. Anytime I question whether God can heal or not...her life is always my walking, talking example that He can.

But I know a lot of people who do have faith in Gods healing power and who do believe that He will heal them...but never receive their healing. People who trust God suffer every day...and die every day.   So what does that mean? Those people don't believe enough? Or have strong enough faith?  I think it's kind of a dangerous thing to tell people...maybe a false sense of security even...to simply really believe in your healing and it will be received. 

I'll tell you what I do believe. I believe Gods will is perfect...and I trust in that. I know that He has the power to heal me right now and I do not doubt that for a second. But that might not be His will for me. 

When my uncle visited me yesterday he spoke to me about 2 Corintihians 12...which is interesting because I had just read it the day before...so to me, that means God really wants me to understand something from this chapter.  The verse that spoke to me was verse 9..."my grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness"  

I realized that this verse is what I believe...during this time of weakness ive been able to see how God loves...how He works all things together for good...how He can move mountains...how He provides peace that surpasses all understanding....how there's power in prayer.  I do believe God can heal me...but more importantly, I believe He has a plan and purpose for me...and that's what I choose to put my faith and trust in.