Wednesday, January 18, 2006

what is love?

The stores are now shelved with huge stuffed gorillas, frogs, and teddies, clinging to puffy read hearts, bearing nauseating statments like "I love you"..."Be mine"...and "Happy Valentines Day." My least-favorite holiday will soon be upon all of us, bringing with it more harm than good. This is the day when people raise their expectations, hope beyond hope, and for some...like me...dread beyond dread.

To the poor souls who have resorted to reading this blog as a means of combatting bordom...I warn you...I am in one of those "love's completely overrated" moods. Bear with me if you have the patience to do so. My BF sent me an email today...the question in the subject line was the exact question that had been floating through my head the entire night and much of the morning. "What is love?"

Apparently the question was asked to a bunch of 4 to 8 year olds who had astounding answers...such as, "When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn't bend over and paint her toenails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands gotarthritis too. That's love." Rebecca- age 8. The rest of the definitions of love were just as impressive. In my effort to write down in words what it is I am looking for and expecting from love...I responded to my BF with these words..."love is a rare and precious jewel that is so hard to find. but to discover love, is worth all the hardships and struggles you face along the way. to find someone who loves you is to find your biggest fan, the one who wipes away your tears with no questions asked, your team mate and partner in this thing called life, who knows your dreams and encourages you to live them."

I hate to bring up something so cheezy as a reality TV show right now, but this reminds me of a scene from this week's episode of the Bachelor. He went on a one on one date with a rather goofy girl. They were in the middle of a river in France, in a romantic boat, having a once-in-a-lifetime type of dinner....and regrettably, she finds this is the most opportune time to cut up an orange peel and stick it in her mouth to make it look like jacked up teeth. As goofy and embarrassing as she was, she said something that totally struck me.

She said, "All I can do is be me...and the person who is out there for me will love me for me." At taht moment, the goofball made total sense. It didn't matter how socially akward she was...the right guy for her woulda laughed with her...and probably made his own set of teeth out of orange peels. I guess that's what I learned this week. The right person will appreciate you for who you are...

7 comments:

Scorps1027 said...

Love certainly is the little, underhyped things:) It's too bad everyone focuses on teh chocolate & roses but seriously for htat goofy girl on teh bachelor, she's right! she can only be herself, goofy and socially inept as that is, and someone who's truly meant for her will love her for her!

kovoor36 said...

it truly is finding the person worht all the aggravation involved with it. love is not always smiles and flowers. and yes, the girl from the bachelor is right, the person who accepts you unconditionally, is the one for you!

cookiemonsta said...

i gave up on love sue... sorry!

Anonymous said...

sadly, i would perhaps do the same thing with the orange..and proceed to clear a room/boat, whatever. hence the existence of my singledom :-( you have to fwd that what is love thing to me, sue- that grandmother thing is too cute!

Anonymous said...

sue - i love your meaning of love;) i think i might use it is that ok?
but i agree w/you - its the little things that make you love someone and make it all worthwhile to take steps with them and devote yourself to them....orange peels and all;)

Anonymous said...

hey..i saw tat episode of the bachelor..
infact girl's response reminded me again of not changing urself for anyone.
it was so cute of her..making teeth out of orange peels.

cookiemonsta said...

get outta the funk blog sue...